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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
Matt fucks homeless dudes behind McDonald's
This job would be great if it wasn't for the fucking customers.
So playing hockey and attending wakes are standard operating procedures ?
- The second one was still being built when they blew it up. - Compliments of Lando Calrissian.
My love for you is like a truck, berserker
Cumming in socks, cum on eileen
Why do you smell like shoe polish ?
since that whore dumped you oh, so many years ago.
This app would be great if it wasn't for the *$&%$* html tags
[ Sighs ] So l shall take my leave of you,
You got a customer.
- Are you calling me a liar ? - No ! He was probably just resting his eyes.
I'm satisfied with my situation for now. You don't hear me complaining.
- What's goin' on here ? - l am not pregnant.
Wow ! You got thrown out for Dante ?
You always back down. You assume blame that's not yours.
- Just wait a few minutes. - I'm gonna break my crazy neck on this ladder.
A little word of advise, my friend, sometimes you gotta let those hard to reach chips go…
The next week, the Foresie family put a hit on Baby Face's house.
I swear. Olaf, metal.
who'll disrupt things just so l can shit comfortably.
The guy that cleans up the nudie booths after each guy jerks off.
No, I'm not.
- Julie Doyer died. - Yeah, right.
- l didn't. You did. - Really ?
That's not cheating. People say crazy shit during sex.
- Yeah, sure. Go ahead. - Thank you, sonny boy.
- So I'm told. - Yeah.
What, do you work here now ?
and claimed that a Quick Stop employee...
No, l might be leaving early to go out with Caitlin,
<MUSIC> Just save up all your nickels and dimes <MUSIC>
It's not your fault. it's Dante.
Married me
<MUSIC> Hear what l say, yeah <MUSIC>
- She thought l was Brad Michelson. - What do you mean ?
Oh, lord. Can l use your bathroom ?
Even though l work in a video store, I choose to rent movies at Big Choice.
- What's your point ? - My point is, you're a clerk, paid to do a job.
That’s his fucking metal face
than the people that come in here to buy a paper or, God forbid, cigarettes.
<MUSIC> Don't ever want to break your heart in two <MUSIC>
Oh, my God. Why did you tell me you only had sex with three guys ?
Yeeeeeeeaaaaaah!!!
Yeah, we get off the same time every day.
-See? You vented. Don't you feel better? -No.
<MUSIC> Go your own way <MUSIC>
- l don't wanna go back-- - Of course not ! Not now !
[ Door Opens, Closes ]
I love her.
No, l was visiting my man.
- And what, you're gonna dump her for that Caitlin chick ? - Maybe.
- Am l right ? - What in the hell is that ?
Don't hurt yourself, buddy. I'll go to Twinspires instead.
Trump supporter! Trump supporter!
You will be missed.
I'd like to get paid to sit on my ass and watch TV.
DO I LOOK LIKE HIS FUCKING BIOGRAPHER?
I've got no time to bullshit around, waiting for that son of a bitch.
Let's kick some ass ! Yeah !
Look, you're a roofer. Some juicy government contract comes your way.
Hey, try not to hit any deer on the way through the parking lot.
This is RST Video calling. Customer number 4352.
- This what you want ? - Knock it off. That used to be my girlfriend, all right ?
- Oh, a couple ? - I'm not the one trying to patch things up with my ex,
I have come way too far and studied too damn hard...
- What responsibility ? - All right, if you hate this job and the people...
You're as curious as the rest of us, pal. You've tried it.
They don't even know I've left school yet.
- it's probably from being around all this food every day. - Oh, l know.
- What happened to home by 12:00 ? - Boss hasn't shown up yet.
Hey, Redding ! Come on. Get this fucker !
Stock boy said he'd been looking through cartons of eggs for half an hour,
But meanwhile, all you ever do is talk about Caitlin.
You mean you haven't heard anybody say anything about either one of these ?
- Bunch of savages in this town. - That's what l said.
BECAUSE I NEVER HAD SEX WITH HIM. YOU SUCKED HIS DICK!
I could never reach
- [ Coughing Continues ] - [ Woman ] Freeze !
- So l stopped home and l brought you some lunch. - What is it ?
My love for you is like a truck. Berserker!
<MUSIC> Stuck out here, stuck in here <MUSIC>
I like to think I'm a master of my own destiny.
<MUSIC> My love for you is like a truck, berserker <MUSIC>
Crash any trains Train road
without even discussing how he felt with his present one ?
<MUSIC><MUSIC> [ Hip-Hop ]
What, are you shitting me ? I wanna get cigarettes.
Were you gonna tell me, or were you gonna send me an invitation ?
- Your argument is that title dictates behavior. - What ?
<MUSIC> I know you know Just want to know <MUSIC>
I'm the source of all your misery.
[ Woman Moaning On Video ]
I'm going to put the hookers in Times Square to shame with all the guys l go down on now !
When she calls me now, she's a different person. She's frightened, vulnerable.
When l say l don't want to get married, I mean just that.
Then how could she-- You know.
You ask me who l choose.
Amanda______Me
Like Tiffany at a strip club
my girlfriend sucked 37 dicks! in a row?
That's exactly right.
I thought I'd give you a hand.
Forget Caitlin Bree. You been with Veronica how long now ?
Oh, you used to go out with her ?
- l can't close the store. - You just closed the store to play hockey on the roof.
Yeah, l know.
When the library board goes and cancels the meeting
- [ Door Opens ] - Thanks.
- Who went back there ? - Nobody. l swear.
- So the casket fell over. Big deal. - Her fucking body fell out !
[ Woman Moaning On Video ]
<MUSIC> Are you more than dead <MUSIC>
- l think all four of you better sit down and talk it over. - All four ?
How many dicks have you sucked?
You sit there and blame life for dealin' you a cruddy hand,
If you're gonna drink it in here, I'd appreciate it if you don't bother the customers.
I choose you.
- Yeah, but it's for employees only. - l understand.
- Couldn't get the shutters open ? - No.
My point is that people dictate their own behavior.
- l was trying to call for half an hour. - Why ?
- Will you let me explain ? - Explain what ?
Wait a second. Do we have to play at the park ?
- No, she's getting married. - To you ?
Cute cat. What's its name? Annoying customer.
- l take it she likes the guy. - You'd think she's marrying him.
That’s his fucking metal face
How did you get here so fast ?
- John Francin and Rob Stanslik. - Wow.
Would you like some making f___, berserker
I knew who he was, and based on that, I turned the job over to a friend.
- Silvan ? No, l snowballed him. - Yeah, right.