HOT
APP
STORIES
QUIZZES
DISCOVER
MEMES
EMOJI
More
CREATE STORIES
DAILY
DISCOVER
PHRASES
NUDGE CLIPS
CONTENT REQUEST
LOGIN
HOT
APP
STORIES
QUIZZES
MEMES
EMOJI
STORY
DAILY
PHRASES
DISCOVER
NUDGE CLIPS
REQUEST CONTENT
×
Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
Do you remember?
I mean, when you hear hooves, you think horses, not zebras.
so you can pay my boss back the money you lost.
And, statistically speaking, there's about 30 kids in here,
Their desks are empty. Someone has to fill those seats.
Guess what? You're coming with me.
ow Great Was the video? It's Not Great. It's Fantastic!
HE STILL DOESN'T UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT
Found a deer vagina.
Gators bitches better be wearin jimmies!
We are going to oat you it will happen again
Come on boy
Captain, You Really Wanna Disarm This Guy, Take Out The Batteries In The Calculator.
Were you just thinking to yourself, Fresh start?
I understand there was a bit of a mix-up with the whole scaffolding business.
I don't know where I'm gonna sleep tonight.
Can you imagine where you'd be in your career if you hadn't shot Jeter?
You know what? That's very funny. I have never Miranda-ed anyone before.
What do you even do around here except make memes?
I hate you! I hate you!
They sound like a baby blowing out the candles on a birthday cake.
- Night! - See you... See you, Terry!
Come on. Bring it in a little bit.
Mirela imi pare rau daca te-am suparat
You know what that's called when they do that in there?
Maybe a sleeper cell, but it's too early to tell.
Two cops talking down a case while eating food, all right?
small dimples just above a woman's buttocks...
I had to go to a specialist to get my hips realigned.
This is a safe room, no judgment here.
It’s Thomson. Are you stupid, or are you deaf?
LaChrisa
Whoa, whoa, whoa, this is a restricted area!
That's where I met Sheila. I was a mess.
HEY, GUYS, I DID IT! I DID MY FIRST DESK POP! GUYS?
What are you doing?
People down here are starting to murmur that you don't have the balls to do it.
We're losing him! We're losing him! He's dying!
Pimps don't cry
And I just had to come here tonight to tell you that I love you.
That's okay, Susan. Two Glacier waters with Mediterranean limes.
Look, there's a lot to live for in this life.
and it'll tell you what the back of his head looks like.
And you come in here, dressed like a hobo, it's distracting.
- Is it the lotto? Who is it? - Who cares? Some rich prick.
First Class Flights, Fine dining, Meeting Beautiful Women
You should of shot A Rod
Oh, man.
- Bye, Terry! - Bye, Sheila! I'll never forget tonight.
Eric: My bad I was hanging with some friends…you know what I mean
Okay. I found out whose losses Ershon has to cover.
and serve it to their husband?
He loves you very much, Francine.
- What is this? - Shut up.
Hey, guys! Soup's on.
WorldCom, Bear Stearns, Lehman Brothers.
No, that's not real!
Thanks for the F-shack, love dirty enio and the boys
TFW your Golf Alter Ego Is desperate to get out there
It's 2:46 Let's have a great day everybody
This coffee table isn't the ego. It represents our shattered sense of community
- Rüşvet değil. - __Elbette bu bir rüşvet. - It's not a bribe. - Of course it's a bribe.
We will be able to trap certain amounts of oxygen.
One at a time, all right?
Are you deaf? Or are you stupid?
You're so adorable. Look at your face. Look at your face.
Did someone call 9-1-holy-shit?
Hey They can't all be 1st Round Draft Picks
Hi.
Because you shot Scotty Scheffler!
I don't like that, actually.
Soda pop. A big, fresh can of soda pop
- Well, I'm gonna kill you first! - And then they will kill me.
No way, Allen. I'm out. I'm done.
- You wanna go? - I wanna go!
You come into our house, you get my Senpai’s name right!
Let's clean the slate right now. Fresh start.
No cheese, no cheese!
What about Ershon targeting the lottery?
Yeah?
Two days ago, this city wept.
and I gotta save what little ass I have left, okay?
You can call me Gene when we're not in the office.
Shake your dicks this pissing contest is over
GOOD TWEET, GOOD TWEET
All right, just one... Just a...
I hope I'm not alone.
- Not... Not right now. - Okay.
Is that her!?!??!? - Yeah
That sounds creepy, Captain Gene.
Tomorrow, we're gonna run those fingerprints through the system.
- Shit. - No, actually, actually, that's...
That's the old... That's the old ball and chain.
My waistline's furious
Truly delightful.
He'll bring it.
What are you doing here? Are you here for the bathmats?
I got my positive pants! And my snack!
sadfasd dfasdfasdf
Leland! You’re, you’re misbehaving, I cannot concentrate, okay?
I don't know what you two have been up to,
I'VE GOT BIG EAST BASEBALL FEVER! IT'S CATCHING
Okay.
- Hello? - Hello, Gene? I mean, Captain.
7:26, lets have a great day everybody! Cut the shit!
He wants to make sure you know
You Email our company, you get my vp's name right
and you attract the media attention, and you bring the DA in on this,
it's not a bribe
Just think about... Just be smart.
What about nine million socially-conscious and unified citizens,
All right, you, sweetie. Come on, let's go. Move.
Hey! Shake your dicks. This pissing contest is over.
Paul Russell
Pimps don't cry
For scaffolding permit violation...
- So the duck is now dead. - The duck is dead.
You’re probably right, Terry. That’s why I feel so sad all the time.
Stop that.
Can’t do it
Can you imagine where you'd be in your career if you hadn't shot Blevins?
Gentlemen, you have a choice. DJais or DJais.
This is firing your weapon in the line of duty.
Within 24 hours of learning about Ershon's scheme
a lot of energy, a lot of focus
I think you can chalk that up to bad life choices.
Fellas, look, I know you don't respect me as a police officer.
...she wants you on top of her, holding her hair,
Who's the man that did that to you? Gator's bitches better be using jimmies!
No winery. No winery. I can’t do it. I can’t do it.
I could be demonstrative!
You've got your postitive pants? And your snack?
Look, we really appreciate the hospitality.
so I could make fun of these lame artsy douches in my neighborhood.
- We're at a funeral. Show some respect. - What?
CASH BAR
Somebody’s sending our wedding invitations
How did you know that, Terry?
Hello.
I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?
But there's one case, one case in a career where you go all in.
Yes! Gun, gun!
Can you please go?
We are locking David Ershon in the federal reserve!
Vanessa
I call bullshit on that!
Martin and Fosse, super cops, in three, two...
Okay. Thank you. Thank you, Detective.
We know that wasn't your security team that grabbed you.
- You wanna listen to this message or not? - Yeah, whatever.
- This is what it was for. - Holy shit.
No cheese, no cheese. They don’t do it.
- What was that? - What?
Thank you.
There's no chance you'd wanna go on that call, right?
My day starts:
- All right, I'm gonna tell you a great joke. - Please. I love jokes.
COBE tastes good Let’s go get some more COBE
its not a space heater
- Bullhorn, anyone? - Truck.
Is it me or does it smell like deer vagina in here?
- Holy shit. Dude. - Just relax, relax.
A ballet of emotions and feelings
Okay. Thanks.
Okay, let me turn it on.
Gators bitches Better be using jimmies
She said she needed my help to make sure that the dates went okay
Really, we're in a punting group and no one is interested in this?
A mutt case.
From everything I've heard, I understand
Hey, Andrew Lloyd Webber. The jig is up, okay?
What a wonderful, lovely evening. Thank you.
and Bernie Madoff,
Cost the city a championship.
- Gene, how's the family? - Good, good, Louis, thanks for asking.
Can you imagine where you'd be in your career if you hadn't shot Jeter?
That's Wesley!
Because you shot Derek Jeter!
I didn't mean it, all right? I'm upset.
I will rock your body with big, nasty hooks. You'll be pissing blood out of your ass.
So much for quiet as church mice!
These suspects were caught with only a quarter pound of marijuana,
- It's not dinner. - Fine.
And serve them up to their punting group?
I'm so sorry about everything.
The new bathmats are in.
Iris, you’re gonna walk a beat downtown!
I gave my love to Erin
Now you listen to me, you piece of shit.
After those three days of non-verbal communication and a whole lot of loving,
Will you say hi to Sheila for me?
All right. Then you do us proud.
Computers! ... What if, one day, they were in charge?
I just wanted to be nice.
Can you get out of here now? I'm talking to my lady.
while they gave me money.
What the...
And it wants to walk up with the people and say, Hey, Gator don't play no shit.
Danson and Highsmith, free hot dogs for life!
- Pull his hair! - I love it.
And at age 11, I audited my parents.
Chinatown. Three Triad gang members. I popped two of them off the draw.
That was surprisingly good, Terry.
'Cause I'm gonna give you this.
- She tells me that every day before I leave. - Yep, I do.
Where do we go? Where do we go?
HOMELRSS DUDE ORGEE BOTTM TEX
And I don't care who.
Hoitz, Gamble, Captain's looking for you.
I absolutely abhor death.
And the Federal Reserve is a prison?
all the sex we don't wanna have with women, but we have to,
I will shove my arm up your ass and work your mouth like a puppet