HOT
APP
STORIES
QUIZZES
DISCOVER
MEMES
EMOJI
More
CREATE STORIES
DAILY
DISCOVER
PHRASES
NUDGE CLIPS
CONTENT REQUEST
LOGIN
HOT
APP
STORIES
QUIZZES
MEMES
EMOJI
STORY
DAILY
PHRASES
DISCOVER
NUDGE CLIPS
REQUEST CONTENT
×
Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
Well, well, well, sorry, boys,
I shut down NPR because they're a total snoozefest,
We're fucked.
Right.
but I had to go in another direction.
Treasury Secretary Baird ordered
Not me.
Yes. Okay, I can't.
- Whoa! - No!
are less traumatized at their unveiling.
- What about your plus-one? - I work for you, I don't date you.
I'm sorry, I can say that now and still get into heaven, right?
What are you talking about? You have to go.
No, we're already known as the Jeffersons, okay?
And now she's back for her big day!
to tell that to his face tomorrow.
- And three... "The Meyer Year." - Yes.
- Yes. Oh! - Greg Morehouse is here for our meeting.
And then with that TV appearance.
- Stop it! - You still love me now.
Okay, going down on each other, whatever. I don't wanna know!
- Really? - Kind of.
and didn't cost her the presidency.
Look at this place. It is such a dump, isn't it?
You are addicted to spending like the proverbial drunken sailor.
with what analysts are urging us not to label a panic.
So boring.
I can't believe that I gave you a goddamn blurb.
and you have a higher reserve of dignity and self-worth.
- Cutting aid to veterans. - Great!
from the first testing of the new host pairing.
Oh, good!
Lights out!
if I could have an invite to the unveiling thing.
- Right. - Oh, my.
Yeah! Cocaine, boating, asteroids, whatever!
- June 14th. Ooh, chock full. - Oh, goody! Great. Go.
and they said this shutdown was a bad idea.
Mom, we had a great wellness check at the doctor's today.
and you're not on it.
I'm gonna go piss in that punch bowl.
And if one person mentions Tom James to me,
- Yeah, you can't do that. - Really? Why can't we?
This is a human being you're making,
- There's just one little thing. - Sure.
who you won't even live to see go to college,
Oh, congrats.