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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
[ALL CHEERING]
No, I'm not fucking okay! I'm not okay at all!
[INDSSTINCT CHATTER]
- MIKE: Fuck! - KEN: What the hell happened?
Sitting here flossing
Now, ladies, do you mind if I refer to you all as queens?
Hey, you guys remember the last time we were in this club...
I'm going to start hiding the kitchen knives in a minute.
How are all y'all nasty motherfuckers doing out there tonight?
Tell me why I never wanna hear you say
Cone of Silence here.
What?
And I can guarantee you that strippers...
Go in there and make her smile, that's all you've got to do.
[ALL CHEERING]
[WOMAN SCREAMING]
Get your Orlando history straight.
I don't know. It's smack dab on our way. Maybe it was meant to be.
Can you hear? She's calling me
- Hmm? - 1959 Château Lafite. That'll do.
[GRUNTING]
Fucking history right here.
- What's wrong with you? - Nothing's wrong. Cookies are awesome.
- Yep. Ahem. Seems so. - Mm.
You guys really want to go down the rabbit hole?
You can follow me.
[CHUCKLES]
KEN: He's not showing you how beautiful you are.
I didn't pick it. Dallas did.
- What are y'all doing here? - Hi.
[ALL CHEERING]
Give me your hand.
I'll clean up the nonbiodegradables.
if I could stop by and borrow a cup of brown sugar.
I like that.
Sweating while you callin' me daddy
All right, let's slow it down, ladies.
KEN: I...
I love you guys. I... Look.
How have I known you this long and I don't know that you were in Desert Storm?
But you don't really feel that way About yourself
I love it!
You don't. That's not what I'm saying. Let me finish.
It's not about being a dancer, Richie. It's not.
Where is your yogurt now, man? I'm starving.
Is this, uh, how the whole trip is going to be?
- Just tell us. - Come on, let's go, come on!
- What am I eating right now? - TITO: You like that, Mike?
- So he's going to live? - Yes.
Well, I don't know. Somebody told me this was a wake.
Why didn't you say so in the first place?
It's awesome.
We're gonna kill on the strip in Myrtle. This is gonna kill.
- Sometimes the songs are a little... - No, it was perfect. Are you kidding me?
They're at every single Circle K and 7-Eleven across Florida.
I have... Uh, can I pitch you something?
She love to climb on top But she love to walk off limping...
I met a photographer in Miami at this party I was working at.
Hey. How you been?
Mmm.
If you want, on the way back down, I'll go over everything you got.
You're goddamn right it's a comedown.
[OPERA MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]
Giving you the best you ever had, babe
You're right.
For free! I don't got to pay for dinner. All I do is sing.
My daughter and her friends are outside.
Oh, let me guess! Mr. Crocodile Dundee done did a little Houdini act?
Oh, shit. Hey, we got a man down!
We need a couple more reliable accounts before I can get a policy for you.
How's that work without Dallas?
[MUTTERS]
Do you see how many girls I meet every day? For free?
The whole thing's like a healthy, mobile block party.
MIKE: All right, let's cut this, then sand it and stain it.
[ALL CHEERING]
Hold this.
Looks like somebody hooked up with a trust fund baby!
MIKE: I got arms. I'll help.
Own it.
Oh, wait, is that not where we are? Whoa.
- She? - Yes, my God is a she. Um...
ROME: I don't know about you, queens...
Keep going till you hit the spot
What's the plan now?
I think you should bring back Pony, bro.
- Fuck you. - KEN: I'm so sorry, man.
The point is, we still got two freak shows, one who can barely dance.
MIKE: I was thinking about doing it again and then I punked out.
TARZAN: It is, man.
Look, I don't know, me and you, we haven't really...
You want to see another horrible idea? I got one for you.
Dearly beloved...
I'm so sorry, man.
- KEN: Come on, boys. - TITO: Yeah.
Thank you, Octavius.
That was a brilliant idea, throwing the costumes out the window? Stupid!
I see me a beauty queen right here.
You hear that? But you know what?
MAN: You can have it your way
ZOE: I did.
[LAUGHTER]
- Oh, yeah, I heard that's real nice, ma'am. - Oh, yeah, I heard that's real nice, ma'am.
[INDSSTINCT CHATTER]
Look at you! You're a fucking Greek god.
we had a couple drinks and were like, He's got the girl and the job, and...
I wanna talk back to her Make love to her
It's like Oprah said: When someone shows you themselves, believe them.
And I've got some good news...
That I want it that way
Don't think I don't know what you're doing here with those girls.
MAN [SINGING]: I'm just a bachelor
ROME: Now, queens, wasn't that a tasty treat?
I'm goddamned if I'll let my last memory of this business be getting laid off.
- A basket full of wine! - MIKE: We got a basket of wine.
[CHUCKLES]
I'm real set. My agent's got me doing YouTube videos now.
Yeah. They gave me something, but it's shit.
[ALL CHEERING]
I bet you can go in there right now and fucking make her day.
But that's why it's going to work. You love it too much.
Baby, you remind me of my jeep-er
[ALL CHEERING]
Is it the look in your eyes
Oh, that was hot! Can I hear y'all say hot?
I wanna make your dreams come true
Don't look at me. Look out into the ocean.
in the Roman Empire, as long as you paid the emperor your taxes...
- I'm proud of you, buddy. - We can do this. We can do this!